My story about abuse with Jehovah's Witnesses

Stories

I was born in 1959, my parents, grandparents and aunts from my father's side were already JG (Jehovah's Witnesses). I am
raised as JG according to all the strict rules of the organization, my father has always means something in it
the organization as a servant or elder. Dealing with outsiders was forbidden and you went
only to be with fellow believers and family who were JG.

I was a year or 12 when a family came to live in our municipality [father, mother and
daughter], these people were an example for the church because their lives consisted of each
day from house to house, such people are called pioneers.

I thought the man of this family was a creep, he had a strange face and always looked at you
insistently, I was a bit afraid of it. I sometimes went to play with the daughter and I liked
it's strange that I always had to sit close to him when he read stories and an arm around me
did and you rubbed, [this was something that never happened to me at home, my parents were whole
distant and cool and did not like cuddling or touching), at one point there was
by that man swimming organized on Wednesday evenings, he would be on the youth who
to pay attention to.

During that swimming that creep always came to me, grabbed me from behind and pressed
against me, touched my breasts and even his hand went down where it was not
to be. I was very confused because I felt that this was not possible. That's why I wanted to
The week after not to swim with, my father thought this was weird and wanted me to go, so invented
I am afraid to not go along. I did not want to go again the next week and told my father
that I found that man so scary and that that man was always with me. My father became very angry with me and said
that I should not appoint myself that way and that I should behave against men [I was 12 and so
unknown if only as far as men were concerned, information was not given]. My father has it
never again talked to me about it.

Swimming suddenly did not happen anymore and a month later the relevant "example"
family moved from our municipality to another part of the Netherlands.
Years later [I was already married] we heard that the old man had been excluded and arrested
because of abuse of young girls, this time he had gone too far and did not go too far with a JG
the indicated.

I spoke to my father about this, I was so angry. Why did not they have this years ago?
professionally addressed and that man indicated, how many miseries and victims this had
can be spared, why put it in the cover up and why it is somewhere else
steer that he could make new victims again, how far has he gone? With me it still remained
with unwanted touches that I was so upset and could not give a place, but what
did he do with others? My father only looked at me and there was no answer
given up, he was an elder and you did not attack the organization and their arrangements.

In the meantime I was married to a man who was also JG and also grew up in it and also from one
Elder family came. We got married very young and we had a short courtship, we saw
each other only on weekends with chaperones. It was therefore very difficult for each other
get to know me well, but I was young [18 year] and really wanted to get out of my house and get married because I already
the nagging about babysitting and you behave when you were in courtship.

Before you get married, the elders will ask you if you are neat during your courtship
you have worn or have not done any sex or other intimate activities, this because if you have behavior
not according to the standards you were not allowed to marry in the royal room of the JG.
Had those elders told me what kind of a man I was going to marry, because he already had
a past how young he was. I certainly would not have married him and a lot
misery had been spared me and others.

We were married for a few years and we had a daughter of 7 months, I myself had 2
young sisters of 10 and 12 years old, my sisters stayed with us during their holidays. One evening [me
had just returned from my work] my husband and my sister 12 were in the room, I was still here
hanging out a laundry and I looked into the living room and saw my sister lying on the couch,
my husband was rubbing his little sister's hand under her skirt ... I was numb ... I went
inside and asked what they were doing, upset my sister and walked out of the room to her
bed and did not want to say anything but wanted to go home, my husband said that I only invented something and that nothing
was going on and that I had to stop this. Every time I wanted to talk about it
he blew it away.

Two years later at a party, he was caught with my sister again by a cousin who saw that he was her
was groping. Again he came away with it by claiming that it is not true
was what we had seen, and again we did not get much out of my sister what is always with him
and her happened. Years later when I was divorced from my husband, my sister recently told me
my husband, for years when they saw each other, felt her and even intimate actions with her
did, and even threatened her to keep her mouth over because otherwise there would be something
happen in the family.

With my sister it did not go well mentally and we did not really understand where it could be,
her mother-in-law repeatedly asked the elders about 10 years ago
yet again to investigate the abuses of my husband and my sister, eventually became
there a date agreed for a conversation, I was very relieved that this would happen because of this
event ran like a thread through my life. But I was not allowed by the elders, it was something between my husband and my sister. I tried everything to go along and try to make it as clear as possible that I wanted to hear and I wanted to see how his posture would be and how he would react if he lied [I recognize that with him] and tell him what I with my own eyes ... but no I was not allowed to be there. My husband went with two elders who had not learned at all how to handle such a complex case to the other municipality where my sister lived and there were also two elders without any knowledge who entered the conversation.

Afterwards my husband came home and told me that nothing was wrong with him, nothing ever happened, it was up to my sister who, according to him, was drunk and stoned on the committee meeting and could not get out of her words. I then called the elders and asked how it had gone and what they thought about it. She did not want to tell me it was a closed case. I was desperate. My sister then became sicker.

Shortly thereafter a young girl came to work [17] year in our company, I immediately noticed that mine
man spent all his attention and energy on her. I asked for it and again it was turned away
with that there was nothing. Two years later there was a letter on the mat that the girl [she is not JG] my husband
before the court challenged, among other things, sexual harassment, sexual assault.

My husband claimed to me that nothing had happened and that the girl was only out for money
she wanted to get out of this lawsuit. At this lawsuit I was also present and then came the
prove on the table what he had done to this girl and for her the functioning in us
company had made impossible, dozens of sexually tinged sms came to the table that he had her
sent. It was clear in court and also for me.

I decided to look for a moment to leave him, I wanted this for years before
but did not know how to handle this and even now I did not know how and what. To be
mother became seriously ill in that same time and I loved her very much and I felt very sorry about them now
living briefly had to put my problem first.

After her death I am [I had a burn-out of everything that happened to me at once and upstairs
came] to our holiday home left to put everything for myself in a row, I have then
a letter written to my husband and told that I wanted to divorce him.

My husband wrote me back, hoping that I would forgive him and come back to him
he confessed everything he did in his life, on paper that he abused my sister, that
he has done sexual acts with many women and young girls.

I was perplexed ... finally what made my whole marriage of 35 years uncertain with him stood up
paper.

I have sent these letters to the elders and to the JG Society. I never have
a reply to recovered, this is also handled and my ex is still one
happy JG who hopes to get a lot of 'sheep' in the organization.

I myself am now excluded, because I got to know a great man that I am good at
feel and who, through this whole situation, helped me to find myself again and a new one
to build life. I lost everything when I was excluded, I am alone with JG all my life
that people from that past may no longer have contact with me.

With the help of psychologists, psychiatrist, counseling and my friend, my life gets a bit of color again
and form, it is still difficult for me to make friendships, I work to do this
improve.

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The main point of my story is: Let the organization understand that abuse must be indicated
and should be treated / supervised by experts and not by elders who are not
having learned and wanting to keep such things indoors, there is so much suffering and misery
to be saved.

- Anna H